“I had glasses & was kind of weird.” – Jennifer Sky
Improv is a hobby of mine & I’m not bad at it. I’d like to say it’s because of my quick wit, natural talent or Wayne Brady-esque vocalizing, but I think it’s all the lying I did as a kid. One of the few tall tales I remember that actually fooled someone somewhat inspired this week’s AN52.
I’ve had 20/20 (or whatever’s good on the eyeball scale) vision my whole life. But when I was in the third grade all of the rest of the kids started getting glasses. So—I decided that I’d get some. I got my mom to take me to the optometrist & then proceeded to lie my toukas off while reading the eye chart. The result was a tearful confession to Mom after an extremely painful hour of wearing the thickest glasses ever made.
But I’ve decided to give it another try, honestly this time, & so this entire week I wore a pair of (non-prescription) glasses. It was painful at first since I wasn’t used to having this extra appendage, but later on in the week, I felt strange if I didn’t have them on. A few amusing things were the ‘fogging up’ factor, how many times I bumped them into things, & the fact that my boss said, “They make you look like you’ve got hootspa/chutzpah.” The downsides were the initial headaches & trying to keep them clean.
All in all, I think if the day comes, I could do glasses. But I won’t be telling any tales to get there.